10 hours ago
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Sometimes, you don’t need to visit a psychic to predict your relationship's fate. Certain signs (omens, if you will) almost always point to heartbreak. Social behaviors can offer a small glimpse into someone’s true character. So, what patterns should we look out for? Spoiler alert: These might change the way you think about your relationship.
Reddit user WesternRhubarb5015 asked the AskReddit community, “What are the signs that a couple won’t last in the long run?” Here’s what people had to say:
1. “Shoving the cake in her face at the wedding without her prior consent.”
2. “Contempt is a sure sign that a relationship is doomed.”
“I will never forget a car ride to run an errand with my ex-husband, where he called me ‘really annoying’ with such disgust in his voice that it felt like he’d stuck me with a knife and wedged it in. Then, I accidentally missed a turn, and he criticized me for the rest of the drive.”
“This reminds me of when my ex-husband basically told me to shut up when I was singing along to a song on the radio. I was embarrassing him! How dare I! Also, he was driving MY car, because he didn’t have one 🙃🤣.”
“That deep sigh they make when you walk into the room is the sound of a breakup.”
3. “This is specific to my wife’s and my experience: If we attend a wedding where they give out commemorative can koozies with the couple’s name and marriage date printed on them, it's highly likely to end in divorce. We’ve been to eight weddings where they gave out koozies. Seven have ended in divorce.”
4. “Being super nonconfrontational. Problems don't just go away when you ignore them.”
“I kept telling my ex this. It's like an archive, and eventually you will have to sort out the storage.”
5. “Not agreeing on whether they want kids or not. This is always a dealbreaker in the long run.”
6. "Not giving each other personal space — like checking their phone, not allowing them to have friends of the opposite sex, or being extremely clingy and bombarding them with phone calls if they don’t reply."
7. “In my experience, it’s a red flag when a couple starts repeatedly posting on social media about how great their relationship is. Especially if only one person in the relationship posts about the other. It feels like overcompensating, and I don't know if I've seen a couple last once this starts happening.”
8. “For me, it’s the silent treatment. If anyone uses that method, they will never change or stop.”
“At this point in my life, I have absolutely no patience for people who refuse to communicate or lift a finger to repair the relationship.
I am not cleaning up anyone else’s mess, and I am happy to make their silent treatment permanent by blocking them forever.”
9. "If one of them tends to include outsiders in the relationship. For example, sharing their problems with family and friends instead of working it out as a couple."
10. “If someone in the relationship hasn't yet lived out their 'discovering myself' phase.”
11. “When they fight in front of anyone.”
12. “Having kids to ‘save the marriage,’ or opening up said marriage to save it.”
13. “Talking to a third party. More often than not, people meet their next partner and set up their next relationship while their current one comes to an end.”
14. “When a couple looks almost 'too good' together…like, idealistically, madly in love (those 'never had a problem' kind of couples). Something is off about that subconsciously for me.”
15. “A surefire predictor of divorce in my friend group is when a couple fights on the day of their wedding.”
16. “One of the biggest challenges that doomed my marriage was a lack of alone time and common interests beyond our children. My ex had a deep-seated fear of babysitters (including trusted family members). We never spent time together without the children involved. The result was no glue keeping us together once the children got older, and no relationship left to hold onto.”
17. “When things go wrong, they turn against each other instead of helping each other. For example, when I helped my brother and his girlfriend move, the moving truck rental hadn’t gone through as they thought. They both immediately started blaming each other rather than trying to come together for a solution.”
18. “When they can't laugh at each other's flaws.”
19. “In my experience, not caring or showing up for each other is a sign that a relationship will end. People can argue, even have serious problems, and still make it through them as a couple. Things really break down when one of you no longer cares. For example, when someone doesn’t show up on birthdays and holidays or when their partner is sick.”
20. “If one person carries the mental and physical load. It needs to be a trade-off. In sickness and in health. I have found myself taking on a lot of unpaid labor, but I know that both men and women go through power imbalances.”
21. “If one or both of them seek attention from other people instead of their partner, despite being in a relationship.”
22. “If a couple has different beliefs about religion or politics. Nine out of ten times, you'd best believe that’s not going to last.”
23. “When one of them criticizes the other in front of people or complains about their spouse in front of others.”
24. “If they don’t communicate. This happened to me with one of my many exes. They would promise to communicate, but they never did. Only after breaking up with me would they communicate all their issues. Oftentimes, those issues could've easily been resolved if they had simply communicated them.”
What did you think of these telltale signs that a couple might be headed for the rocks? What signals have you noticed in your own experience that suggest an impending breakup? Share your answers in the comments or fill out the anonymous form below.
Note: Responses have been edited for length/clarity.
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