1 month ago
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Recently, redditor u/Feeling-Plankton-570 asked a very interesting question to bartenders, loss prevention employees, and other professionals who "read" people for a living — "What's the tell you clock in the first 10 seconds that people don't realize they're broadcasting?"
From knowing who is going to be a problem customer to hinting at more in-depth truths about a person, here are 21 subtle tells they've caught on to:
1. "Family law attorney here: When a potential client explains something with 'and then for NO REASON'...there’s always a reason, and it is usually because that person did something shitty."
2. "For me, it's people TELLING you the type of person they are. 'I'm an honest person, so...' 'I'm a very good person, so...' 'I'm the type of person who...' etc."
3. "As a bartender, if someone does anything other than hand me their ID when I ask for it, I know they are going to be a pain in the ass. Liquor liability insurance, state liquor board stings, company policy, state policy, vibe check — that’s why I have to ask."
4. "I was loss prevention for a large retailer for around four or five years, watching people on camera most of the time. One thing that always got me to pay attention to a person was if they were looking at people more than products. Someone there to buy something is looking at shelves or signs. Most people don't eye up everyone around them and get a lay of who is where. Looking at somebody as you walk by isn't a big deal, but when you are looking around at every person, getting a read on everyone in the aisle, that tends to mean the person is checking to see if anyone is paying attention to them. Most people don't notice people unless they have a goal that requires them to be very aware of everyone around them."
"I used to work at Kohl's as a cashier, and I caught people shoplifting simply because I caught them looking at me instead of looking at the clothes. I'm not particularly attractive; there's no reason to be sneaking a peek at me. I'd call LP, and he'd watch them stick something down their shirt or into their purse, and then I'd watch him whisk them away as they tried to leave. Forty-dollar bonus on my paycheck every time I helped catch someone, heyo!"
5. "I've had various private security roles. Someone who is carrying a weapon but isn't proficient at carrying weapons will be constantly fidgeting around wherever it's concealed to reassure themselves that it's still there. Caught more than a few knives from people nervously playing with their pockets."
6. "I'm a therapist in a dual-diagnosis program (substance use + mental health). Any move from baseline is something to pay attention to. Calm and depressed to bright and happy? Bad sign. Words not aligning with expressions or tone of voice, e.g., 'I'm doing better' with closed posture, avoidant eye contact, flat tone = maybe not okay. Mostly, though, if you let people talk long enough, they'll tell on themselves. Especially if they think they're the smartest person in the room."
7. "Former bartender here. The absolute dead giveaway is when someone is 'performing' being relaxed. 'Regular' people just exist in the space — they look at their phone, scan the taps, or zone out. But someone who is already too drunk, using a fake ID, or looking for trouble is actively putting on a show of what they think a casual customer looks like. They make aggressive, deliberate eye contact to prove they are sober, nod along to background music too hard, or laugh a second too late at things nobody said. Normal people don't try to look normal. The sheer effort gives them away every single time."
8. "I used to work at the return desk at Target, and I could tell who was going to yell at me based on how they stood in line."
"I've been working in retail for closing in on 10 years. At least in my experience, the first few seconds of an interaction (and depending on which area of the store I'm working at, body language) tend to tell me *a lot* about how it's going to go. I can usually tell if I'm going to have difficulties, pleasantness, rudeness, or just disinterest within those first few seconds, and I adjust accordingly. There have been several times when, even before fully interacting with a customer, I'm nearly positive it's going to be a bit of a trial on my end. There are some occasions that I've (happily) been proven wrong, but at this point, I usually recognize the signs."
9. "As a flight attendant, when I do my initial walk-through pass to check for seatbelts, if you don't have your seatbelt on (this is AFTER my first announcement where I ask you to put it on, as we will be taxiing away from the terminal momentarily), there's a high likelihood that you will be the problem passenger."
10. "As an insurance adjuster, I've found that talking about attending church in the first sentence indicates impending lying in the next few sentences."
"I spent 15 years on our HOA board of directors, and one woman would preface every nasty comment or insult with, 'Well as you know I'm a woman of God, but...'"
11. "I used to be a princess at Disney World, and I could tell which kid had loving, interactive, and invested parents within 30 seconds... I could tell immediately the type of home life of a child just by how they interacted. There is a huge difference between kids who are shy, kids who are left alone/not read to/not fully interacted with by caregivers, and children who have parents who are fully invested in raising them. It is so, so apparent, and we talk about it backstage. It is something we are all able to pick up on."
12. "As a radiologist whose job it also is to read people for a living, I’d say tooth health is telling of overall health on scans."
13. "I used to work in police records, basically figuring out who could have access to what info from which police reports. So, I helped people deal with things ranging from minor inconveniences to life-altering tragedies. The people dealing with the hardest stuff often came across as the calmest and most reserved, almost apologetic for inconveniencing us. I learned to watch for that after a customer calmly asked for the report on her violent sexual assault, and apologized that she didn’t have the case number or day/location info, as she’d been knocked unconscious and woke up at the hospital and didn’t remember much."
14. "I used to answer emails for a minor celebrity, his show, and another show. I could read one sentence into the email, and I could tell if they were going to ask him to buy them something. Actual fan mail was short and sweet. Wild people write novels."
15. "Pharmacy owner here. If you come in and start telling me your life story, or worse, ask me tons of questions about myself and flatter me in a rehearsed cadence, I can almost guess the exact prescription you are going to ask if I have or will fill for you. Look, I get it. I get the socioeconomic system. I get the actual hell you’re trying to escape. I’ll help if it’s not in a way that kills you or your friends. Just hand me the prescription and don’t give me a ton of stuff to document."
16. "I'm a teacher. It is INCREDIBLY obvious which kids have 'unregulated algorithm time' online, and which do not. It's not screen time that's the problem, it's not the internet, it's WHAT they're doing on the screen...social media and shorts. They are always talking far too loudly and trying to get attention in every room. They will play videos on speaker in class. They are constantly quoting porn or incel ideology. They will lose focus and get bored or frustrated, even if I am up there doing a full stand-up bit. If they finish their work early, then run to me to ask what to do next, because they need the next thing instantly fed to them."
"Kids with limited or focused internet time are usually calmer, better at solving problems, and okay with not getting instantly rewarded. They're cool reading books, drawing, or hanging out and talking with others."
17. "I’m a business consultant. I graduated from one of Canada’s top business schools with really good grades. I help struggling small business owners make it in this competitive world. A couple of years ago, I met this woman who was a CEO at one of the most exciting tech startups in the world with millions in backing from hedge fund investors. For her privacy, I’ll call her Eliza. When I first sat down to talk with Eliza, the most important thing was to establish some trust with her. One of the first things she said to me was that she was 'engaging with me as a human,' which made me question if she was engaging with me as a human. When I pressed a little more, she insisted, 'I am being real with you,' which, again, raised some concerns about whether she was being real with me. Eliza is in jail for fraud now. I should have trusted my first instincts."
18. "I'm a bartender. The tell is a 1,000-yard stare followed by a game of 21 questions as soon as they walk in. When this happens, you know you're dealing with someone who's already tilted, or someone who is about to become increasingly more annoying as they get drunk."
19. "Bartender turned legal advocate here. A huge tell for a superiority complex is anyone who opens a complaint or protest with, 'Don’t worry, I get it. I used to do what you do,' or 'I know you’re just trying to do your job...' Brad, if you DID INDEED ‘GET IT,’ you wouldn’t be using your former experience as a credential to sidestep the very rule/role/boundary you’re being asked to respect or follow. 'I used to do what you do' isn’t a hall pass to be annoying."
20. "Shoulders and chin can tell you a lot about somebody's level of stress and confidence in that moment. There's no universal tell, though; EVERYTHING depends on context, so the real read is not the person, it's the room they're in. The more you know about someone's environment, motivations, and background, the clearer picture body language and affect can paint for you."
21. And finally, "As a bartender, I could immediately tell when someone walked in that they wanted to place a to-go food order. Something about the way someone walks in with determination made something in my brain click almost automatically. I'd go, 'You want to place a to-go order?' and every now and then, they'd go, 'Yeah, how'd you know that?'"
Are you a professional who reads people for a living? Give us the details on what your job is, what tells you've noticed, and what they mean about a person in the comments or via the anonymous form below.
Note: Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
English (US) 